In the halcyon days of my youth, I used to “get down” quite frequently.

Of course, "getting down" could mean any number of things, from getting down on the dance floor, getting down in the bedroom (or the nearest lavatory) or getting down with drugs (do not confuse with getting down “with the sickness”). I’ve done it all, but I haven’t been a superfreak since before Rick James died. So when I heard that some young filmmakers created The Boys & Girls Guide to Getting Down, a smile crossed my face. I decided to examine from the relative safety of my couch how today’s kids are "getting down".

You know what? Not much has changed.

The film follows a cross-section of young adults as they attempt to go out and get down. The characters are practically nameless, though they're all walking clichés. There’s the punk girl, the dumb girl, the underage girl, the smokin’ hot girl, etc. I would list the type of guys but as the film mentions, most guys are easily divided into horndogs and slamhounds. Anyway, we follow about twenty or so characters as they attempt to navigate one single evening through the Los Angeles nightlife and hook up with the opposite sex.

What separates The Boys & Girls Guide to Getting Down different from your typical unfunny Hollywood sex comedy is the complete honestly that the “guide” format allows it to deliver. In fact, while the film is a complete satire, if you actually watch this with the intent to be educated, you will learn something.

Some examples:

• Frequent the same bars and get to know the staff to get free drinks.
• You know you’re at a house party when there is a drunken girl crying outside.
• When stuck with only coffee liquor and gin left, it’s time to play “Booze Hunt”
• Some guys act as “fauxmos” to get girls.
• Drugs are either “sketchy” or “fun”
• It’s pointless to ask a drug dealer about the quality of his product.
• Try to limit your drunk driving to during office hours.
• And much, much more.

Using the “guide” format allows the film to be broken down into easily digestible segments. So, there is a segment on “Booze,” “The Merits of Marijuana,” and even one for “Pussy Power” all roman numerically organized. More importantly though is that the guide affords a scientific approach allows for experiments. Frequently throughout the film we are shown scientists running live demonstrations. In full lab gear, we get to see them try to purchase weed and cocaine from random people on the street. They show us the effects of alcohol mixed with driving by putting a drunken mouse behind the wheel of a Barbie-style convertible – with disastrous results. It’s as effective as any classroom film in The Educational Archives.

While the far-too-real character types with extremely accurate dialog are going to make you laugh and cry, the segment that rang the truest with me (particularly because of many heavy “next morning” discussions due to heavy cocaine use) was Chapter XV: Sunrise. The film describes the 5:30 A.M. scenario where “some bright spark will start making plans for tomorrow with their new best friends.” These are plans that absolutely, positively, will not happen although everyone present agrees that they are good ideas.

You would have to be pretty puritanical in order to not recognize the humor of this program, but it isn’t for everyone. Men and women who have navigated similar scenes are going to find a lot to laugh about because everything about the character types and situations included here are instantly relatable. Humorless people who haven’t lived this lifestyle, or can’t laugh at themselves or their friends are not going to get much out of it. They might even think that it promotes a specific lifestyle. Fact is The Boys & Girls Guide to Getting Down is a really good account of the endless cycle that people without direction take and it poignantly documents the negative with the humor making the medicine all the more easily swallowed. Think Requiem for a Dream, only by way of Mean Girls and Dazed and Confused.

I remember one party, when I was about 20, where I woke up downstairs and outside from the party I was at, lying on my back with a girl I don’t remember passed out over my legs. The most memorable thing about my wake-up call from my friend at 4:30 A.M. was that I was still holding my scotch glass, half-full on my chest. Memories like this make wish I saw this guide ten years ago. I would have saved a lot of money. But more importantly, I would have learned a lot in 93 minutes that ended up taking me eight years.

Paul Sapiano who wrote and directed this film, is a complete genius. I wish him nothing but the best future the industry can provide him.

The DVD Presentation
Okay, folks! I didn’t rate the video quality because the DVD I watched The Boys & Girls Guide to Getting Down on was clearly labeled as a screener in every respect (cover, disc, etc.) and the film itself was frequently watermarked by a color shift and a “Don’t Sell This Fucking DVD, It’s Not For Sale” warning. I respect that, I really do. But I can’t judge the product. As for the non-altered parts of the film, I thought it was a decent transfer, but it wasn’t exactly sharp. If the retail copy is the same, I would give it 2.5-3 pants. Audio fares better, but I was listening to a 2-channel Stereo mix while the packaging states that the released copy will have a 5.1 mix. It also says that there will eventually be Spanish subtitles, but they weren’t on my copy. Sorry guys, I’m in the dark with how this will turn out.

And the Extras Are?
Behind-the-Scenes featurette –
Again, since I have a press copy of the film, this featurette, although listed on the case, was not available for me to review.

Previews –
My copy of the DVD had no menus, but my PC showed me two trailers for films called The Secret of the Cave and The Ferryman. The later is a horror film that while low-budget seems to have some style and potential.

Again, since don’t have the street release I can’t say for certain what’s on the final product. Score gets a big fuckin’ question mark. If I get around to seeing the end disc, I’ll be sure to update the review.

The Bottom Line
I was happily surprised with The Boys & Girls Guide to Getting Down. It reminded me so much of the misery and hilarity of my post-High School years. I don’t know how it will perform for anyone else, but I imagine that anyone who has ever been involved with the club scene, no matter how infrequent, will find this film a really biting satire. I will be bringing this out for my friends to see. It’s going to be a great party film with near infinite replayability. I recommend it fully.

Oh, this movie also has Mr. Belding in it. You know, from Saved By the Bell.

Seriously.