Look, I have to come clean with everyone here: Temple Of Doom isn’t my favorite chapter in the original Indy Trilogy… actually, it’s my least favorite out of the bunch and, much like Return Of The Jedi, Steven Spielberg’s Indiana Jones And The Temple Of Doom gets that prestigious Bronze Metal platform. I know a lot of you are already angry because I said that, so I’m going to go ahead and throw in a little disclaimer: I am in no way saying this movie is bad, but rather the lesser of three hugely successful and immensely entertaining motion picture classics.
So there.
I do have other reasons for not awarding this movie with the Silver of Gold Medal: mainly Spielberg’s direction of the movie. Like any trilogy or three-act presentation, this second chapter of the original Indiana Jones franchise is the darker chapter: the mood isn’t as cheery, the characters aren’t as lucky, and the story isn’t as sterile. Unfortunately (and he has admitted this in interviews), Spielberg didn’t like the whole “dark” thing… and so the scenes that are supposed to be either dark, eerie, and/or foreboding come off as being nothing but cutesy. Cutesy means kids. And child actors. And I hate child actors.
The Wilhelm Scream is used three times. Never a good idea.
Then there’s that Kate Capshaw woman: Spielberg fell so madly in love with her that he allowed her annoying, prissy, stereotypical female role to ham it up big time (he married her, too). At times, her portrayal as Willie makes this film damn-near unwatchable (and her hairstyle is a bit too 1984 for a film that takes place in 1935).
 So, anyway… for those of you who by some bizarre, unexplainable reason have never seen this film before, the plot goes like this: Indy and his sidekick, a kid known as Short Round (Ke Huy Quan - later known as Jonathan Ke Quan), pick up an irritating nightclub singer and wind up in India, where they are pressed to find a missing mystical stone. The stone (along with an army of child actors) is being held by a revived version of the Thugee cult (kinda like that one episode from The Man From U.N.C.L.E. only with hearts being ripped out and stuff).
I remember when Indiana Jones And The Temple Of Doom hit my hometown back in ‘84. At the time, we had but one single-screen theater. The movie was a smash hit and remained the one and only feature playing for at least 16 consecutive weeks! This in itself probably subconsciously caused me to not like the movie as much as everyone else: I had already seen the movie, dammit - when were they going to dump that film and get Star Trek III: The Search For Spock or Ghostbusters for crying out loud?! Years later, just after the DVD format was introduced and George Lucas announced “It won’t be released on DVD, so forget it!”, my then two-year-old daughter would joyously watch the movie… repeatedly… day in and day out… over and over… with an old, worn-out Full Frame VHS copy, too.
Oh, the horror…
 All kidding and nitpicking aside, Indiana Jones And The Temple Of Doom is an especially fun film and, despite being a huge hit the world over, was slammed by critics - receiving a big steaming heap of negative reviews in the process. Many parents were outraged at the amount of onscreen violence depicted in the film (as they were with Gremlins, too - which Spielberg produced) and, as a result of their inability to take the time to figure out what exactly “Parental Guidance” actually meant and take the responsibility to screen what their children watched for once (better known as Conservative Christian Cowardice in some circles), they complained. Thus, the “PG-13” Rating was born. Then, somewhere down the road, the Conservative Christian Cowardice struck once more: this time the parents neglected to take note of the “13” and instead, complained again. Now, the “PG-13” Rating enables filmmakers to show a half-covered ass, one tit, and a singular usage of the word “fuck”. I think if Indiana Jones And The Temple Of Doom were to be made today, it would be released (cut) to the theaters with an “R” Rating and the subsequent home video release would be available in its original Theatrical Version and an “Unrated” Release “featuring footage too extreme for theaters!”
Fuckers.
 Presentation
You know, I looked and looked… but in the end, I think these are the exact same transfers from the other release. The disc even includes the same ugly Menus from the first DVD release (which are annoying at best): images from the film have been given that watercolored look (which any average, run-of-the-mill photo enhancement/paint program can do) and those mine carts leading you to and from the Main Menu get real old real fast (not to mention the looped music).
The audio options and subtitles are still the same, too… no DTS for little ol’ me… (sigh)…
Extras
OK, so if your first question regarding this Special Edition version of Indiana Jones And The Temple Of Doom is “Are there any Deleted Scenes?” The answer is a big, gigantic “No.” If you’re second inquiry is as to whether or not Spielberg has finally decided to contribute an Audio Commentary track to this double-dip release--well, then you’re in for another disappointment. As a matter of fact, nobody graces us with a commentary track this time ‘round (Spielberg really needs to get over his phobia about that)… but what this rather lackluster “Special Edition” does provide is a The Temple Of Doom: An Introduction (5:59) hosted by Steven Spielberg and George Lucas; Creepy Crawlies (11:54): a Featurette about well, creepy crawlies; Travel With Indy: Locations (10:30) - another Featurette (both of the aforementioned Featurettes feature optional Pop-Up Trivia Subtitles); Storyboards: The Mine Chase (2:31) - a comparison of the original storyboarded sequences plus their big-screen adaptation for several selected scenes; four different Galleries (Illustration & Props, Production Photographs & Portraits, Effects/ILM, and Marketing); and a Preview (or “Demo” as the cover calls it) for Lego Indiana Jones: The Original Adventures Game (which looks like great fun for the kiddies).
 The Bottom Line
It’s obvious that this new “Special Edition” is nothing more than a blatant attempt to cash-in on the theatrical release of Indiana Jones And The Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull: everything here has been brought over from the old DVD release and many of the Extras were both filmed during the making of the fourth installment in the Indy franchise and also (though subtly) promote it. My advice is hold out for the “Definitive” or “Ultimate” or “Collectors” Edition (or whatever they may call it - it could be the “Indylicious” or “Indycisive Edition” for all I know) which will no doubt be released at some point following the release of the Indy 4 on DVD.
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