Yeah, I’m not afraid of insulting our readership, because chances are if you’re reading this review then you either know me, or clicked some random link. If you’re of the latter, then you’re probably just expecting some scathing sodomizing review of a film that you’ve never seen and are never going to see because you think it’s the next You Got Served, and you’re far to hip and trendy and cool to be seen watching that. You’re only here to read some mean-spirited tripe because you’re bored and your Prozac prescription has run out.

Well screw you, and go fuck yourself because Step Up 2: The Streets not only kicks the ever-bloody ass of the original film, but it also rocked my socks so heavily that as soon as I was done watching it, I immediately rewatched the entire second half. Because, frankly, it’s awesome.

What’s all the fuss? Here’s the story. You got this girl named Andie (Briana Evigan, a total babe, btw) who, you know, is all kinds of cute and troubled. Her mom’s dead, her aunt simply must be the devil because she lives in Texas and if she doesn’t stop hanging with the 410 dance troupe, her guardian is going to make damn sure that she’ll be taking the A-train to the Lone Star State. The 410 (pronounced Four-One-OH!)? The 410 is a bunch of urban dance kids that cause all sorts of mischief for public dancing. I’m not joking. They “terrorize” people on the subway by dancing in front of them, and then putting up tapes of themselves on YouTube. So anyway, these hip-hop somewhat skilled and borderline acculturate individuals are looked at as criminals throughout the land and Andie is forced to get her act together if she wants to stay in her community. As a last resort, her neighborhood friend Tyler Gage (Channing Tatum, reprising his role from the original Step Up) convinces her to enroll at MSA

Rising above the average and garnering herself a higher education doesn’t sit well with her clique. Soon, due to “lame” things like studying and practicing, Andie gets expelled from the 410. Her street dancing style does attract a lot of new friends at MSA though which helps ease the pain. The most important of these new acquaintances are Chase (Robert Hoffman, who along with Channing Tatum also worked together in She’s the Man) who immediately develops both an admiration for Andie’s skill as well as her… appearance. Other friends include Moose (Adam Sevani), the nerdy out-of-place character of this film, akin to Pretty in Pink’s Duckie.

Andie forms a new troupe of dancers and is ready to take it to The Streets an underground dance competition. The new crew has a couple of roadblocks though with the 410 on their shit and Chase’s brother/teacher Blake (Will Kemp, Van Helsing) objecting to street dancing. But blah, blah, blah. While the plot is admittedly staler than that piece of toast that fell behind your dorm room’s couch six months ago and is now an honorary part of the family, its still leagues better than the genre’s competition. The romance is typically fluff and isn’t satisfactorily fleshed out. Step Up 2 is not, under any critical analysis a good, clever, or interesting movie.

But that doesn’t matter, because this is a dance movie, and all that matters in a dance movie is how good the dance scenes are and how many of them there are. Step Up 2: The Streets covers every angle in those regards. All of the dance sequences, including the mini-rehearsal footage, are fun to watch, and many different styles of dancing are covered from ballet, to salsa, to interpretive, to the expected street dancing. The entire film is exceptionally well choreographed, and the all-important final “battle” at The Streets competition is really, really sick.

Am I recommending it? Should I bother? I think that you already know if you’re in the demographic to watch Step Up 2. If you’re not, then you should stay clear away. If you’re just a dance movie nut like I am, who considers his original Flashdance one-sheet amongst his most prized possessions, then chances are you don’t even need my thoughts to go get this. But if you want it, Step Up 2 is fucking incredible, and you should watch it tens of thousands of times.

Presentation
I’ll make this short. Step Up 2 was released theatrically on Valentine’s Day 2008. That means it’s a recent flick and it should look fucking stunning. It does. This looks about as good as standard DVD gets, and as I await my Blu-ray to ship from Amazon, I can only speculate how much more awesomer it will look in HD. Nevertheless, DVD customers will be happy. The 5.1 mix however wasn’t quite as spectacular, which suffers a little disappointment for a film that relies on dance, music and sound effects. However, during the all-important dancing scenes, and most particularly, the final awesome sequence, the surround effects really feel like you’re there. It does its job. There is also a Spanish and French audio track, which if you can read this review you don’t need, and subtitles in those same languages.

Extras
Deleted Scenes (with optional commentary) – (22:38)
There are eight deleted scenes for your bemusement. The commentary option here is a bit different than most DVDs. Instead of the standard audio-only style just like a feature commentary (which Step Up 2 is lacking by the way) Chu introduces all of the clips before hand and explains why they were cut (most for time). There are the expected lost subplots of little importance based around underdeveloped characters that wouldn’t have been more integral to the story had they been on screen more. Aside from the extended dance cuts, particularly of the Jabbawockeez crew, there is little to get excited about.

Music Videos –
No less than six music videos grace this page! First, of course, is “Low” by Flo Rida f. T-Pain. This is the song that has been in constant rotation on hip-hop stations this year, and I even heard it in a club as recently as last week. This song won’t stop and it’s a fairly awesome dance tune. The other music videos are “Ching-a-ling / Shake Your Pom-Pom” by Missy Elliot, “Killa” by Cherish f. Yung Joc, “Hypnotized” by Plies f. Akon and “Let it Go” by Brit & Alex. Clearly, fans of popular Hip Hop are getting a nice package here. Personally, I really only cared for Flo Rida and Missy Elliot’s videos. The rest are just passé except for the Plies song, which is unbearably awful. The sixth video is actually Cassie singing “Is it You” which was supposed to be in the film (it’s also a deleted scene). Not a bad song, but nothing great.

Through Fresh Eyes: The Making of Step Up 2 – (12:24)
This was surprisingly engaging and nowhere near the EPK style that I expected. Chu is a first-time director and he helped assemble how some of the scenes were put together and held even this feature to a cohesive narrative.

Outlaws of Hip Hop – Meet the “410” – (4:54)
Ahh, here’s the fluff. This is just kind of a spotlight of the dancers in the antagonist’s crew. You won’t take anything away from this.

Robert Hoffman Video Prank – (1:58)
Hoffman antagonizes a convenience store clerk with his pop and locking. Convenience store clerk barely flinches because he’s probably seen it all anyway.

Easter Eggs Aplenty –
There are five Easter Eggs that I’ve found hidden around this DVD:
Bonus Features Page – “Jon Chu tells Briana she has the role” – (2:19)
Deleted Scenes Page 2 – “Background dancers dance on-set” – (1:16)
Set Up – “Adam kisses Cassie” – (1:37)
Audio Options – “A day in the life of a film set” – (1:07)
Subtitles – “Post-wrap Dancing” – (1:38)

Previews –
This being a DVD related to Disney, promotional crap is required to be tacked on. Here there are trailers for the first season of Samantha Who?, the second season of Ugly Betty, The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian, The Nightmare Before Christmas, Camp Rock and Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus: Best of Both Worlds Concert. Then there are cross-promotion bumpers for Blu-ray and Miramax. No trailer for Step Up 2, which is a shame because it was a well edited trailer. You can currently download it at the PS3 online store, or a billion places around the web.

The extra features are a mixed bag for what interests me, but I expect everyone who is going to buy Step Up 2 will find something to enjoy here. Personally, I dug the music videos and the deleted scenes with commentary, so for lack of a feature commentary, I’m giving it a 3. The rest of the features didn’t do anything for me.

The Bottom Line
I’m not going to lie, I enjoyed the hell out of Step Up 2: The Streets, and I will enjoy it again and again many more times in the future. It may not win any awards, but its story is better than average for its genre and the dancing is incredible. Plus – hot chicks.

If liking dance movies is wrong then I don’t ever, ever, want to be right.